It's been a month since I returned from Tuscany, and I still haven't resumed painting.
Such pauses used to worry me. I would immediately become anxious and sink into thoughts and fears that maybe I had lost it... Today, I embrace these pauses with love. And this year has been full of pauses.
Sometimes pauses stem from a low mood, sometimes from an exceptionally good mood (it's well known that melancholy is good for creativity :)). Sometimes pauses in creation occur because the artist isn't visited by the "muse," and sometimes it's a kind of introspection where no actual creation takes place but there's an internal brewing. Maybe before a change, maybe before a new project.
A beautiful comparison to this situation is the fall (and perhaps it's no coincidence that it's autumn now??) The fall is a vital process for the tree's survival and development. And yes, I know that not all trees undergo fall. I assume that not all artists experience pauses either... but it's interesting to look at the reasons for leaf shedding with the thought of paralleling it to the world of creation.
1. Energy conservation: The tree enters a state of rest to conserve energy. In winter, when weather conditions are harsh and resource supply is limited (like water and sunlight), the tree stops processes that require a lot of energy, such as producing chlorophyll in leaves. This allows it to gather strength for spring, when it will burst forth anew and grow.
2. Protection from cold: The leaves constitute an exposed area that could lead to water loss through evaporation and freezing of fluids in their cells. By shedding its leaves, the tree limits exposure to cold and dryness and preserves moisture in its trunk and roots.
3. Cleaning and healing process: Leaf fall allows the tree to renew itself. Old leaves may become a burden, and they are removed to make room for new, healthier growth.
4. Preparation for renewed blooming: The winter dormancy isn't complete inactivity, but a stage of preparation for a renewed burst. Inside the trunk and roots, internal processes of storing nutrients and preparing buds for the next season are taking place.
Pause in creation isn't just emptiness or idleness, but an important part of the creative cycle, just as the tree enters a period of rest to return stronger and fuller in the next season.
I want to hope that the pause this time is a kind of internal maturation. Time will tell.
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